Summer Edition
You’ve reached the place where all the bad, but oh-so-satisfying entertainment exists. Here, in the Trash Vortex, we provide you with only the trashiest, most bingeworthy recommendations. It’s a dark hole you won’t escape!
Trashy Series
Try a so-bad-it’s amazing TV series for those rainy summer days when you don’t want to be outside.Hemlock Grove
Hemlock Grove is peak trash. Between the melodramatic plotlines, the hammy acting from otherwise talented actors, and the unintentional (until it isn’t) homoeroticism between the two leads, Hemlock Grove is a very bad, very enjoyable show. Following Peter Rumancek, a Romani teen whose family has just moved to a new town (the eponymous Hemlock Grove, Pennsylvania), Hemlock Grove feels like producer Eli Roth’s response to the mid-2000s teen vampire craze. Oh, that’s right: Peter is a werewolf. And Hemlock Grove is a town inhabited by monsters—including the morose teen vampire Roman Godfrey, played by a Bill Skarsgaard who hasn’t quite perfected his American accent yet.As a Netflix original, the production value of this show almost manages to trick you into thinking it’s good. Don’t be fooled. Hemlock Grove is a show that thinks it’s deep, introduces some promising concepts, and then gets lost in the woods on its way to deliver the punchline. And yet? With its lush scenery and lingering cinematography, it so effectively creates a foreboding atmosphere that you’re hooked from the jump. Available free on Tubi.
—Kana Coonce, Trash Vortex Editor
Vanderpump Rules
A few years ago, my youngest brother demanded that I watch former Real Housewife of Beverly Hills Lisa Vanderpump’s reality show Vanderpump Rules, so we could talk about it. I caved and gave it a try, and the result was a summertime catchup binge the likes of which has never occurred in my household before or since. It’s the trashiest good time, and the current season is far and away the most dramatic and addictive of them all. Vanderpump follows a handful of young, good-looking would-be actors and actresses who start out the series waiting tables or bartending at Lisa’s flagship restaurant SUR (which stands for Sexy Urban Restaurant). The staff takes workplace fraternization to another level, constantly dating and dramatically breaking up with each other, slinging drinks in various coworkers’ faces, and occasionally threatening to set one another on fire. What makes it all bearable is the genuine care and love the cast seems to feel for each other, even amid the frequent petty feuds. As the world went into lockdown in 2020, the Vanderpump drama slowed waaaay down, with the cast throwing mild-mannered house parties in quarantine and having real-estate adventures. I thought I might have to give up the show. I mean, if I wanted to watch someone milk drama out of home-repair challenges, I’d film myself. But the 2023 season came roaring back with a vengeance when longtime Vanderpump couple Tom Sandoval and Ariana Madix split after Tom cheated with pageant queen Raquel Leviss and tried to gaslight Ariana into thinking it was all her fault. Her friends circled the wagons around her, with lots of shouting and finger-stabbing at Tom, and Ariana used the breakup to reinvent her life. In the wake of “Scandoval,” Tom has been left getting booed at his tragically off-key band’s So-Cal concerts, while Ariana has booked gigs on Dancing with the Stars and a Lifetime movie called Buying Back My Daughter, in addition to accepting an invitation to the White House Correspondents’ Dinner. It’s a well-deserved karma boomerang coupled with an inspiring you-go-girl arc that has me riveted.Yes, my weekdays are spent reading and teaching literature, but Wednesday nights are my time to decompress, turn my brain off, and watch someone else’s drama. If you need something mindless this summer, Vanderpump Rules will be just what you ordered. All seasons streaming on Peacock, with new episodes airing weekly on Bravo.
—Tracy Fernandez Rysavy, Driftwood Advisor