April 1, 2025
The Best Dungeons & Dragons Character Build
Are you interested in coming to the table and being the strongest player? Do you want to smite your enemies to smithereens, roll high in every single stat, and end combat in one turn? Well, have I got the build for you! This amazing character build will be at level 1, since we all know that level 1 is the best and highest level. If you follow these simple steps, you’ll have the most amazing, most powerful D&D character ever!
First, you’ll want to pick your class; there are a lot of great classes in D&D, but in this case, we’ll want the tankiest class possible for the purposes of our build. We’ll pick the class with the best health ever: wizard! As a wizard, you’ll take hits like they’re nothing!
Now that you’re a wizard, you’ll want to pick some special things up. You might be asked to pick some skill proficiencies for being a wizard; the options are things like arcana, investigation, etc. To be honest, none of those are good enough. Just skip that part and say that you have no proficiencies; they do more harm than good anyways. The exciting part is picking out your spells! Spells are an integral part of wizard gameplay, so follow this list for the best spells to pick!
Cantrips:
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- True Strike: This amazing cantrip is the best cantrip in the entire game; you HAVE to take this cantrip!
- Prestidigitation: This cantrip can literally do anything you want. Take this spell and tell your DM that you want to make the entire enemy camp explode in flames; it will work 10/10 guarantee!
- Friends: Wow, this cantrip is amazing. A whole minute of advantage of charisma checks is unbelievable. Sure, the person you cast the spell on will get angry after that one minute, and it’s prone to frequent failure, but who cares! That ENTIRE minute is so valuable!
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Spells:
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- Skywrite: This spell allows you to write up to 10 words in the sky! The best part of this spell is that if there is even a small gust of wind in the air, the writing goes away!
- Gift of Alacrity: Make sure to always use this spell AFTER initiative rolls.
- Distort Value: Use this spell to make your items always appear less valuable! Say goodbye to fashion!
- Tenser’s Floating Disk: Use this spell so that your teammates don’t have to walk to places! Unfortunately, the disk only moves if you move, so you’ll have to do all the walking while your friends get to sit or stand on the disk for free transportation.
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With all these spells, I’m sure you’ll see how amazing it is to be a wizard; you’ll surely put fear in the hearts of all enemies! Or not! This character build is a complete joke; don’t follow any of my terrible advice! April Fools!