April 26th, 2023
You’ve reached the place where all the bad, but oh-so-satisfying entertainment exists. Here, in the Trash Vortex, we provide you with only the trashiest, most bingeworthy recommendations. It’s a dark hole you won’t escape!
Videos to Take You Down a YouTube Rabbit Hole
Procrastinating on your finals? Brain feel like mush? Just want to take a “short” break? From video essayists to game critics, these YouTubers have consumed all of the trashy content you could ask for in order to present it in an easily digestible format. It’s like baby food, but in video form!Monster Factory
Monster Factory is a series created by the prodigious brothers McElroy (Griffin and Justin, to be precise) in which the two sit down to create the most monstrous character they can using the character creation tools a video game gives them. Between the Frankensteinian creations and the brothers’ childish giggling, it’s impossible not to have a good time. My personal favorite monster? Jaa’m, the sequel to dogs.The Excruciating Tale of Bad Cinderella
Have two hours to kill and want to learn about something completely inconsequential, but nonetheless entertaining? Hate Andrew Lloyd Weber and want to feel vindicated? You’ve come to the right place! Video essayist Ashley Norton thoroughly roasts Weber’s flop of a musical Bad Cinderella, first providing viewers with a rundown of the show’s rocky past and then reenacting the production with lovingly crafted puppets. Whether you love musical theater or detest it, there is something here for everyone.One Direction During the Purge 
Do you enjoy bizarre fanfiction? Jenny Nicholson does! If you have a half an hour to kill, join Nicholson as she browses Wattpad for works about the boy band that took the 2010s by storm … and discovers just how many stories there are about what sorts of activities Harry Styles gets up to during the Purge. As a lifelong geek, Nicholson’s earnest commentary is always a delight, even if the stories she’s reading sometimes aren’t.
—Kana Coonce, Trash Vortex Editor
This is the podcast that took Tumblr (and 17-year old me) by storm. Join the dulcet-toned Cecil Palmer as he regales the desert city of Night Vale with its weekly news, interviews with the locals, and crushes on the new scientist in town, Carlos. Of particular note is fan-favorite segment “The Weather,” which features a song submitted by a different indie artist each episode. With a colorful cast ranging from Hiram McDaniels, the five-headed dragon, to Kevin, the radio host of sister city Desert Bluffs, to an ever-rotating cast of interns, there’s a character to relate to—or not—for everybody. Also, if you’re a fan of live shows, Welcome to Night Vale frequently tours, always with a stage-exclusive story and surprise guests. Its next stop? This Sunday in Madison. Anyone have $27 and a half-tank of gas they’re not using?
Written and performed by Jonathan Sims, The Magnus Archives is a fictional anthology series told through the lens of the new head archivist at the Magnus Institute, an organization that deals in the bizarre, the unnatural, and the frightening. As the podcast progresses, seemingly disconnected threads begin to connect into an overarching mystery that will keep you huddled under the covers into the early hours of the morning to reach its conclusion.
aranormal investigators and full-time weird specialists Greg and Dana Newkirk host this enormously fun podcast along with researcher Connor J. Randall. In addition to paranormal investigating and podcast hosting, the Newkirks run a traveling museum of the paranormal, which is the basis and inspiration for their podcast. Every two weeks, the Newkirks and Randall pick an item out of their vast collection of haunted objects and detail its place in the paranormal cannon, the story of the item, and its historical significance. The items that have warranted episodes so far have ranged from scrying mirrors to a plank from the Amityville house to a haunted clown doll and even historical merch from the 1980s sponsored hunt for the Mokele-Mbembe. Every episode is a chance to learn about cool paranormal history delivered in a fun and engaging conversation between these specialists. If you’re a fan of anything spooky, historical, or even just love a well-researched podcast, check it out!
Hannah Bellinger has gone her entire life as the “side character”. When it comes to both her work and relationships, she’s in the supporting cast. She helps her sister on her journey to find love, and she is always a shoulder to cry on for friends. She is even a production assistant, literally getting coffee for the leading actors in the films she works on. However, when she develops a close friendship with the handsome and carefree Fox Thorton while visiting her sister in the small fishing village of Westport, WA, things get complicated. Quickly. She realizes she is starting to have quite the crush on Fox and doesn’t really know what to do about it. Who would go for a supporting actress? To top it off, the filming crew she’s working on is moving the production from L.A. to Westport, and Hannah ends up having to crash at Fox’s place for a week. Will their friendship last the week intact or will they both make some mistakes? Will Hannah finally step into a leading lady role in her life?
Do you love the Bristol Renaissance Faire? Think it’d be oh-so-romantic to meet a significant other while wearing chain mail or a court jester costume? If you answered with a resounding, “Aye, m’lady!” I have a stupidly fun story for you. In Well Met, big-city girl Emily returns to her small hometown of Willow Creek, Maryland, to help her sister recover after an accident. She’s counting the days until her sister is back on her feet so she can get out of Hicksville, but then her niece ropes her into working at the local Renaissance faire. (And yes, “faire” always ends with an E in that context. Why? I have no idea. It just does.) She’s assigned to work as “Emma the tavern wench” at the drinks station, wearing a costume cut down to South America and watching the lucky women dressed as fairies or queens flit about the grounds while she’s hefting ale crates and slogging grog across the bar at unruly Vikings and elves. To top it all off, there’s Simon, a know-it-all English teacher in charge of the tavern, whom one Goodreads reviewer described as a “strict, pretentious d**chebag.” Needless to say, this is an enemies-to-lovers romance. 
Usually, one might assume that watching a sport would be more interesting than listening to people talk about one, but this podcast might surprise you. Go! My Favorite Sports Team is hosted by Mark Fischbach and Tyler Scheid. Mark is a YouTube influencer who also goes by the alias Markiplier while Tyler, who is a close friend of his, has a master’s degree in sports administration. In this podcast, Tyler explains and discusses different types and aspects of sports to Mark, who is someone who practically knows nothing about them. Not only is this show educational, but it is also absolutely hilarious as Mark tries to understand and interpret the information that is given to him. The two have great chemistry with each other and make something boring such as sports rules and technicalities into something funny and engaging. The podcast can be crude at times, which might cause some to turn away, but for me, it doesn’t ruin my enjoyment of the show. As someone who isn’t very interested in sports, I find it very enjoyable with the added bonus of actually learning about sports. It’s a show that has something for everyone.
Do you love psychological horror? Are you looking for a movie full of twists and turns? Well, look no further: Midsommar is perfect for you! The film follows a woman, Dani, whose sister commits suicide and kills their parents at the same time, which leaves Dani to grieve the loss of her entire family, while dealing with a very “interesting” relationship with her (in my opinion) terrible boyfriend. The boyfriend, Christian, invites Dani as a mean joke to his friend’s small compound community in Sweden to write his senior thesis. While at the compound, strange things keep happening with the other people there as they begin to celebrate Midsommar, the traditional festival the compound holds. What begins as a “retreat” ends as a cult basically brainwashing and using rituals to force newcomers to stay or die, depending on their choices. This movie is 100% worth the watch as long as you can keep up with the storyline and don’t mind gore or some disturbing scenes. I give this film a 8.5/10 and would highly recommend it to anyone who loves a good psychological horror movie, especially those who are fascinated by cult life.
Much like Tame Impala, Monster Rally is actually just one guy. He produces a type of music called “plunderphonics,” which, if you haven’t heard of it before, is not for pirates. Most of the music is made up of samples of other songs, twisted and mixed together into something brand new. It leads to a strange, yet wonderful mixing pot of sound. The album, like most of Monster Rally’s music, has a heavily tropical sound. The vibes are immaculate, like a vacation for the ears, beachside with your toes in the sand. It’s warm and inviting, never overstaying its welcome. Any way you slice this mango, it’ll be a tasty reminder of the warm weather yet to come.
Seth Haley, also known as Com Truise, is an American electronic DJ that has gained popularity since 2011. Much of his work contains little to no lyrics, giving his synthwave production the full spotlight. Com Truise’s sound is inspired by electronic genres from the 1980s, providing a contemporary but recognizable feel on his three studio albums released since 2011. Interestingly, Com Truise gained more recognition when he remixed a song with fellow electronic artist Daft Punk for the soundtrack of the film Tron: Legacy (2010).
If you were the kid who never actually learned how to play the game—and just ate the pieces—this one’s for you. The goal of Hi-Ho! Cherry-O is to collect ten cherries from your individual trees into your bucket. Taking turns that continue clockwise, every player must spin the action wheel in the middle. Perform the action that your spin lands on, and the play continues to the next person.
Have you ever sat back and wondered to yourself, what was that game called where the elephant blew butterflies out of his trunk? Maybe you weren’t thinking that, but if you were, do I have the answer for you! Elefun is “the butterfly catchin’” game by Hasbro. In this game, one fills up the elephant’s trunk with the little butterflies and flips the switch by the elephant’s tail. This turns the little fan on, and the butterflies start flying out of the trunk. Each player then has to catch as many butterflies as possible. (You can even grab them from off the floor!) Once all of the butterflies are released from the elephant’s trunk, everyone must stop grabbing butterflies and total the number they have caught. (Catching those little butterflies is harder than you think!) The person with the most butterflies wins a token! The individual who wins three tokens wins the game. Yet no game is a good one without a little twist. The twist in this game is the special blue butterfly! The person who catches this butterfly automatically wins the token no matter the number of butterflies others catch. The game allows 2 to 4 players and is available for ages 3 and up. Although this game is meant for a younger audience, it can be fun for almost all ages. I definitely have fond memories of running around the living room playing it and would absolutely play it now. Who wouldn’t want to feel like a kid again?
This game is very easy and doesn’t require much effort to leave you with hours of enjoyment. This fun activity requires you to use plastic fishing rods with magnets attached to catch the little multi-colored fish while their mouths snap open and close as the little plastic pond they’re in spins. The goal is to catch as many fish as possible before the other player can. To make things more challenging, players can choose to catch only fish of a single color. I personally started playing this game around the time it was released in 2006. It has left many generations of kids, including me, with fond memories. I rate this game a 7/10 simply because over the years it got pretty repetitive (seeing as I am no longer a child). This game can be purchased on Amazon for around $8-10 and even includes free returns just in case you somehow aren’t satisfied with your hours of mechanical fishing.
Wake up, Detective. We have a murder to solve. In the heart of an impoverished, war-torn city of Martinaise, a hanged body has been reported in the backyard of a local cafeteria. The Revachol Citizens Militia, the law enforcement agency of the city, sent one of their best, Kim Kitsuragi, to investigate the murder—and sent their worst. You. To make matters worse, you’ve woken up in your apartment with a throbbing headache, a shattered window, a bathtub full of booze bottles, hardly any clothes on, and worst of all, you don’t remember a single thing.
In Risk of Rain 2, you find yourself stranded on a hostile alien planet. The game is a roguelike, which means there isn’t one set storyline; rather you play individual games, or “runs.” At the start, you select a character and are dropped into the randomly generated world empty-handed. The runs are broken up into stages, and your goal for each stage is to find the teleporter at the end, while being attacked by a whole array of enemies the entire time. Throughout the world, there is loot you can acquire to make your character stronger, but don’t get too attached because death is permanent. Each run provides you with a unique experience, with loads of new items and characters to unlock and secrets to be found all over the place. Play with a few friends, or just face the deadly aliens alone in this fun but challenging, chaos-fueled ride through space. Available on Steam and for PS4, Nintendo Switch, and Xbox One. 
The 2023 Northern Lights Literary & Arts Journal will be launching on Thursday, May 4th, and you’re invited to the party! Join us at 6:00 p.m. in the campus library to hear contributors read from or talk about their works, and to be among the first to get a print copy of the journal. We’ll also have light refreshments!