April 28, 2022
You’ve reached the place where all the bad, but oh so satisfying, entertainment exists. Here, in the Trash Vortex, we exist to provide you with only the trashiest, most bingeworthy recommendations. It’s a dark hole you won’t escape!
The Horror Edition
From lousy acting to over-the-top gore and everything in between, horror is a genre that seems to be a minefield of so bad it’s good trash. You know, the kind that might even be considered comedy. Our staff is very excited to share their selection of unintentionally hilarious horror flicks.When a Stranger Calls (2006)
Police inspect a crime scene where a babysitter and three children have been murdered, one-hundred or so miles away from where high schooler Jill Johnson lives. A babysitting gig that begins as punishment for exceeding cell phone minutes (hello early 2000s) becomes a lucrative set up when she arrives at the massive home of the wealthy Madrakis family with kids already in bed. Instructed to help herself from their stocked fridge, Jill will bear her punishment well. Soon, the phone rings. When Jill picks up, the caller says nothing, though incessant raspy breathing can be heard, before hanging up. This goes on for a long time, and Jill naturally assumes it’s a prank every time. That is until the nameless voice asks, “Have you checked the children?” Panicked, Jill phones the police who eventually trace the calls from INSIDE THE HOUSE. This is a babysitting nightmare…literally. I remember watching this in theaters when I was in middle school, genuinely feeling spooked as I watched Jill meander through dark corridors with a ringing phone in hand. I do also remember that even then I found the caller’s ceaseless breathing kind of funny. I mean, why was this basically the entire plot? Somehow, I don’t think I’d find it suspenseful today. If you’re not into the scaries like me, then this might be the movie to ironically watch for some mild-mannered fun. Available to stream on Netflix.
—Shannon Ribich, Trash Vortex Editor
The Poltergeist of Borley Forest
The Poltergeist of Borley Forest is a low-budget horror film about a high school senior, Paige, who attends a party in the local haunted woods. She stumbles upon a tree with a rope dangling down from a branch while looking for her ride home. From then on, Paige is trailed by a spirit, claiming that he loves her. Why does he fall in love with Paige at first sight? It’s never explained, but who cares? Not the screenwriter, that’s for sure! The rest of the film focuses on Paige and her friends and family as they try to stop this spirit from hurting anyone. After the spirit brutally attacks Paige’s friend, the rest of the film focuses on Paige and her friends and family as they try to stop him from hurting anyone else. They even left the ending open to a sequel!This 2012 film checks all the boxes of bad horror movies. Bad acting? There is plenty of it to the point that I wonder how the actors were chosen for their roles in the first place. CGI straight out of the twentieth century? Enough to scare any modern movie enthusiast. Terrible pacing? I don’t think the writer, editor, or director know what that word means. Comical fight and action sequences? Yes, apparently pretending to get thrown across the room by an evil spirit with supernatural powers is really hard to fake, or it was for these actors, at least. Do I still want to recommend this movie to you? Absolutely! It is so fun to pick apart bad films, especially with friends to bounce commentary back and forth with. Watch The Poltergeist of Borley Forest for free on Tubi.
—Serenity Block
Fright Night (1985)
Nothing sucks me into the Trash Vortex like a 1980s vampire film, and the original Fright Night tops the list. When a handsome, mysterious stranger moves into dorky teen Charlie Brewster’s neighborhood, he can’t help but get out his binoculars to spy on the parade of beautiful women that go through the man’s front door. However, it eventually dawns on him that he never sees them come out. Then, one night as he peers through the blinds, he spots the neighbor and his roommate carrying out what looks like a body. And my, what big, sharp teeth the man has.A fan of the popular late-night horror TV show Fright Night, Charlie immediately wonders if the neighbor is a vampire. (As one does.) He enlists the help of his friend, “Evil Ed” Thompson, who thinks he’s gone insane but still helps him make a list of ways to expose and expunge a vampire. The most important protection, Ed tells him, is that a vampire can’t enter your house unless he’s invited, so Charlie is safe as long as he’s inside. Cue a trip downstairs, where his mother introduces him to Jerry Dandrige, the suspected creature of the night. Charmed by Jerry’s smooth talking, as only a 1980s 40-something female cliché can be, Mrs. Brewster tells him he’s welcome to enter her house “any time, Jerry.” What’s a terrified horror geek to do? Corner local celebrity and Fright Night host Peter Vincent, of course, whose character is a vampire hunter. Because of course that’s his real job, right? Vincent wants nothing to do with Charlie’s terrified ramblings. Until, that is, Charlie’s skeptical girlfriend Amy hires Peter—who is desperately in need of cash due to his show’s impending cancellation—to prove that Jerry is not a vampire, so her guy will shut up already. Problem is, Jerry actually is a vampire, and when Peter’s tests secretly reveal that, it’s up to Charlie and him to put a stake in him before he kills more innocent people.You know that “bomp-chicka-wow-wow” sound people make when they want to reference X-rated films? That pretty much encompasses the main soundtrack to this campy ’80s classic. The special effects are ridiculous, and the acting is a lesson in scenery chewing, for the most part. But while William Ragsdale’s Charlie is about as exciting as a bowl of vanilla pudding, and Amanda Bearse’s Amy has the voice of a human kazoo, the film is elevated by Chris Sarandon’s slinky, terrifying turn as the vampire Jerry, as well as Roddy Mcdowell’s hapless TV host-turned-actual-vampire hunter Peter Vincent. While this movie received a decent update in 2011 starring Dr. Who‘s David Tennant, nothing beats the original for a trashy good time. Available to rent on Amazon Prime and Vudu.
—Tracy Fernandez Rysavy, Driftwood Advisor
Most say that the sequel can never live up to the original, but in this case, it is incorrect. XCOM 2 stays true to previous XCOM games with its turn-based combat. The major twist that most veterans of the series did not see coming was the fact that the XCOM project failed, due to how many players lost in the original game. Twenty years after XCOM: Enemy Unknown took place, the aliens have fully taken over the globe and now go by the name Advent. Advent is the new government and wants to keep everything and everyone under their control, with more sinister plans behind the scenes. Due to the new world they now live in, what is left of XCOM must stay vigilant and cautious with their base now being a hovercraft.
The classic horror stories of famous author H.P. Lovecraft have been reimagined in this serialized fiction podcast. We follow the hosts of the fictional true-crime podcast The Mystery Machine as they look into three interconnected cases, all based on three of Lovecraft’s longer tales, The Strange Case of Dexter Ward, The Whisperer in Darkness, and The Shadow Over Innsmouth. In season one, we meet Matthew Heawood and Kennedy Fischer as they examine the mysterious case of Dexter Ward, a man who went missing from his room in a mental institution. As more strange details come to light, Matthew and Kennedy begin to realize just how deep this mystery goes. Add in a slow-burn romance and eldritch horrors galore, and you’ve got an interesting and terrifying show.
If you think our last book recommendation, Gone with the Wind, ended too abruptly, then you may be satisfied to know there were numerous sequels made. Shortly after original author Margaret Mitchell’s death, Alexandra Ripley was permitted by the family to write a sequel. Ripley’s 1991 Scarlett picks up right where the 1936 novel left off, leaving you right in the emotional wreckage dumping ground that is now Scarlett’s post-Civil War existence.
After he somehow finds himself in present-day Germany, Adolf Hitler becomes quite the local celebrity and gains a following. Filmed with real-life reactions and interviews of native Germans and tourists, this black comedy asks what would people do if somebody like Hitler came back into the limelight. If you can find yourself a copy, since it’s currently not on any major streaming site in the US, I highly recommend it.
When Suzy travels to Germany to a ballet school, she begins to uncover a dark history with the building when 
Knives Out is a clever interpretation of the classic whodunit mystery plot. Harlan Thrombey (Christopher Plummer) is a famous crime novelist, and his dead body has been found in the attic study of his sprawling Victorian mansion. Police officers are ready to rule Thrombey’s slit throat a suicide when Detective Benoit Blanc (Daniel Craig) enters the scene. The movie manages to turn into a double mystery when we find out Blanc received an anonymous envelope with money and a news clipping of the murder. Who killed Thrombey and who tipped off Blanc?
Enola Holmes is a fresh, lighthearted take on the Sherlock Holmes canon. Enola’s (Millie Bobbie Brown) upbringing by her mother Eudoria (Helena Bonham Carter) is anything but standard for a woman in the Victorian era. She is taught history, science, literature, and jiu-jitsu. Life for Enola goes suddenly awry when she wakes up on her sixteenth birthday to find her mother missing. Now she must live with her older brothers, Mycroft (Sam Claflin) and Sherlock (Henry Cavill). Both brothers, unimpressed by her ambition, want to ship her off to boarding school where she will learn how to be a proper lady. Enola knows better; after all, Eudora taught her to be an independent thinker. Enola escapes to London, vowing to uncover her mother’s mysterious disappearance. Along the way, she meets a young lord also on the run from an unwanted destiny with a mystery of his own.
If you’re someone who loves scary movies but craves a good story plot and not just gore, I highly recommend The Boy (directed by William Brent Bell) It is the perfect combination of scary elements, mystery, and an intriguing story line that will leave you guessing until the last second. This story follows an American nanny, Greta (Lauren Cohan) as she cares for a child of a British couple going on a holiday. Things seem great right off the bat. She is staying in a beautiful mansion, a handsome grocery boy (Rupert Evans) brings her orders every week, and she is getting paid extremely well. The only problem is the child she is caring for is a doll and doesn’t seem to be a very nice one. This film does an amazing job keeping you on your toes and throws so many twists and surprises to leave you on the edge of your seat. If you haven’t seen this movie yet, it is a personal favorite, and I guarantee you’ll love it. It is available on Amazon Prime or YouTube TV.
The window to apply for admittance to the UWGB nursing program is open! If you want to declare nursing as your major, fill out and 
Last week, I mentioned the campus pool, located in the Field House, to one of our Marinette students, and the response was, “We have a pool? What is the Field House?” So let me just tell you all that yes, we have a pool. The campus pool is also known as the River Cities Community Pool to Marinette residents, and anyone can come swim during open hours—but only UWGB students get in for free with your student ID.