It’s almost two months since the semester started, but the cause of my stress continues to be the language barrier. It’s painful when I can’t understand what the teacher is saying during class. The most difficult thing for me is not being able to express my opinion the way I want. I would like to exchange opinions with more people. However, when expressing my opinion, I must be especially careful with my words to avoid making mistakes regarding what I want to say. Currently, I have very little participation in discussion classes. During discussions, what is in my mind is the fear of what would happen if I spoke up and made a mistake. Furthermore, I may have expected the teacher to give me preferential treatment because I could not speak English, but I was naive.
However, I understand that just worrying about things will not change the current situation. I thought it was important to first accept my current situation. It’s natural that learning a new language is challenging and time-consuming. I realize that the important thing is not to be negative about my situation, but to calmly assess my situation and think about what to do next. Another thing I noticed about my mind is the direction of expectations. I was directing my expectations toward others, like I expected my teachers and friends to be considerate of my language barrier. However, I realized that success is more realistic when you set your expectations on yourself instead of on others. I think having expectations for myself makes me more confident and brightens my own life.